The
night was black. Not like you could really tell on Queen St., but somewhere,
this very same night was black. And cold. The night was bloody cold. The cold
and not-so-blackness slapped me across the face like a wet fish as I came out
of Reverb. Hmm. Blurry. The night was also uncomfortably blurry. The impact of
the wet fish seemed to have rendered me senseless and blind. The contacts
rasped across my lacerated eyes as I blinked and squinted against the
blurriness, the cold, and the not-so-blackness. And the wine. *blink*
Coffee. Must find coffee, and then a cozy ride home in the belly of the red
dragon. I lurch into motion, suffering only a minor contusion whilst navigating
the doorway, which lurches ferociously. Queen St. itself heaves with equal
vigor, but I reach the corner without further incident, and set forth,
squinting furiously, trenchcoat flapping, looking for all the world like The
Man With No Name caught in a sandstorm.
Somehow, I obtained the precious fluid, and trekked unsteadily back to
Bathurst to await the detested bus. Some aeons later, I snap back into
semi-consciousness, cursing the weather, the pvc, the damn bus driver, etc.,
and I realize that there remains but an inch of now iced-coffee in the
snow-encrusted cup. DAMN. I needed that coffee. Squinting peripherally, the
gloom reveals a blurry dark object, waist height, to my right. Hah, a garbage
can. How convenient. with practiced ease, I toss the cup into the open maw of
the receptacle. Or where the open maw should have been, anyway.
Imagine if you can, my horror when the cup *bounces* off the top of the can,
emitting a shower of iced-coffee, and the can itself subsequently *Explodes* in
a blurry flurry of whirling hair and appendages, emitting an anguished
shriek.
Once my heart finally resumes function, I'm made aware that the "garbage
can" in question was, in fact, a young lady in the process of tying up her
boot. In retrospect, I suppose I can't really blame her for not liking the
"but I thought you were a garbage can" excuse..
Still, if you're reading this, coffee's on me next time.
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