By Brasspen

brasspen(at)yahoo.com

Note: the opinions reflected in these columns are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of toronto-goth.com. Email toronto-goth staff at tg(at)toronto-goth.com (subject line must be "TORONTO GOTH") about this column or any toronto-goth related issues.

It sucks when you go to a club and ask about a song. Who did that? And people don't have a clue. For YEARS I wanted to know who sang the Star Trek Borg song. It has a sample of Patrick Stewart saying 'Engage!' YEARS went by. Finally it was played again, and I asked people until I got an answer. It was Futile by Velvet Acid Christ/Funker Vogt.

Not to get down on DJ Pale, but for aeons he has been hammering me with the bands FisherSpooner, Wumpscut, and Underworld. I hate these bands. I hate the depressing, dirge-like droning they call music. If I hear Wreath of Barbs one more time, Iım going to scream. Now, itıs his club, and he can play what he wants, but Iım thrilled to be able to finally say what I hate about his sets. I found the secret to learning the names, and now Iım going to pass it on to you.

Lean closer, little girl.

Before I talk about Internet radio, Iım going to start here at home with a website called distortedcircuitry.com. For all intents and purposes this is the effort of two DJıs: Razorgrrl, and DJ Morgana. They have weekly pod casts available from the site for download and replay on your iPod. But they are very different DJıs. Razorgrrl is more of a DJ for another scene, where they have techno or something. She finds some very exotic stuff, but it gets on my nerves as techno, all instrumental stuff, often does. I like songs like I like my relationships ­ with a beginning, a middle, and an end. Techno is usually a middle, a middle, and a middle.

DJ Morgana is actually something of a find. Iıll preface this by saying Iıve talked to her once maybe four years ago, when she was just another nobody in the DJ booth at the Vatikan. Sheıs more than that now. Her pod casts are exactly what you want. She has whatıs new. She tells you about it, and generally keeps you informed. I canıt get the song Dirt by Assemblage 23 out of my head. Thatıs her fault.

She also does a radio show on CIUT (89.5 fm or ciut.fm) at 11pm on Wednesdays. At least thatıs what the website says. I tuned in (14 March) and found Jim "One More Quaalude" LaMort. More techno. Sigh. Upon further inspection it seems she DJıs maybe one week in three.

Having been turned on to CIUT, I noticed that there is a two hour show on Thursdays at 10pm called EBM. I checked it out (15 March) and found it as unengaging as the night before. Did I mention how I like my relationships? But check it out. Maybe it's for you. CIUT is also available on Star Choice Satellite and Rogers Digital Cable.

To return to distortedcircuitry.com, itıs pod casts are well documented, and it seems that DJ Morgana is an authority who will keep you in the know. My only criticism is that sometimes when she talks, she sounds self-conscious. She gets more relaxed and easy to listen to as pod cast goes on, though. If she could be as mellifluous at the beginning of her pod casts, as she is at end of her pod casts, this would be perfect. It seems to me that sheıs Torontoıs preeminent EBM DJ.

What I listen to most, and which has radically improved my knowledge of Goth scene music, is Death Guild Radio on the Internet. Live365.com is a battery of hundreds of Internet radio stations. This place has whatever you want to listen to.

Search for a band you want to hear. Then the web page will produce dozens of stations that play that band, and whatıs included in the play list. So you click on the accept button and your iTunes can play the radio station. This is free with commercials, but I broke down and am paying the $6 a month (or something) for commercial free.

When you do that, you may find youıre still getting commercials. At that point itıs time to switch from iTunes to their free download application called Radio365. When that happens, youıre knowledge starts to explode, because you have a scrolling screen of every song that was played in the last half hour with the band and album name. Once your start Googleing, Wikipediaing, and YouTubeing the songs you like, you rapidly turn into a Goth music kung-fu master.

Some of the stations on my presets list are Death Guild Radio, Gothic Paradise Club Mix, Red Blood Gothic Radio, Darkest Before Dawn, and Black Wings Radio. Gothic Paradise Club is out of Salt Lake City, Utah. Can you imagine being a Goth there? The only exposure I have to that town is from a movie called SLC Punk! Not my idea of a fun place to be. Itıs more Morman than Morman. The Death Guild is a club night on Mondayıs in San Francisco. There are more details on their website.

As a technical aside, thereıs a reason why Ladytron has an album called Commodore Rock, and The Birthday Massacre has a song called Video Kid. It has to do with a special synthesizer sound common to many EBM bands. The Commodore 64 computer was and is (Google the word "demoscene") absolutely massive in Europe. It has a famous sound chip called the SID chip, which makes a sound that you immediately associate with early 80s new wave and video games. There is a Swedish Internet radio station for music composed solely on the C64 called slayradio.com. If you want to know about SID related sequencers, sound cards, and MIDI plug-ins, then you can come out to the Toronto Pet Users Group (tpug.ca).

If I were to recommend only one site to visit, then that site would be metropolis-records.com. If you learn the names of even five bands on this site, youıll be able to name-drop for months. Itıs weird, because to a large extent EBM is a European music, but the most successful bands ­ bar none ­ are managed out of Pennsylvania. Do they sing in German? They are probably managed by Americans. This explains one thing to me about the band Hanzel und Gretyl. Germany has banned the use of this symbol ­ "SS" ­ in public places. They have a dim view of Nazi regalia in public. Hanzel und Gretyl do a kind of pseudo-Nazi-send-up every time the play. Theyıre from New York City. Any guess who theyıre managed by? You guessed it ­ Metropolis. That website is an EBM supermarket.

One last Internet radio station ­ spiritofradio.ca. The only time I ever saw The Cure was at the top of a rollercoaster at Canadaıs Wonderland 13 July 1986. I saw The Stranglers on 9 April 1987 at Massey Hall. Do I have a freakishly good memory? Ask me your name five minutes after Iıve met you. The reason I know this is because spiritofradio.ca has a running stream of recorded radio shows from the 1980s, when CFNY was a fantastic station. It sounds silly to say, but itıs true. Once that station was great. Itıs DJıs chose the music, they knew tons about it, they loved it, and they would talk, and talk, and talk about it. I listened to them back then, but Iıd forgotten how glorious and quirky they were.

Soon youıll be an expert. With these Internet radio stations, youıll be partying like the velvet frilled, anemic vegetarian you are. When you hear "Hereıs a message for the girls about vaginas!" Youıll look bored, and say "Yea, Yea ­ Lords of Acid."

By Brasspen: brasspen(at)yahoo.com

posted March 2007 by dem